Press the Pause Button – Peace, be still!

Dear God,

Growing up, we learnt so many life lessons the hard way….

I am reminded of an argument I had with my friend’s cousin back when we were kids. For some reasons, he insisted that the colour of water is white, while I tried to make him understand that water is colourless. After a while, the discussion turned into a heated argument, and my aunty called us in for order. Before reaching her room, the boy started shouting …. “Aunty, aunty, shey the colour of water is white, abi?

My aunty replied to my greatest surprise, “Yes, the colour of water is white.”

This boy jumped triumphantly and pointing at me, shouted, “she is not listening to me, arguing and shouting back at me. She started it 1st.”

“So, this is why you have been shouting down the whole house, right?”, my aunty said frowning. “I will punish you especially, you are not allowed to speak or say another word for the next 5 hours”, she said to me strictly.

The boy was very happy, jumping excited that he had won the silly debate. He went away saying to the other children, “I said it, the colour of water is white.”

I was too shocked at the outcome, but I accepted the punishment in good fate and sat silently for 5 hours wondering how on earth I lost on something so obvious. 5 hours later, I went to my aunty’ s room to be released from the punishment, and asked her very quietly, “But aunty, you know that water is colourless, right?

“Yes, she grinned

“Then why did you confirm his error and punish me?”

My aunty replied, “This has nothing to do with the colour of water. I have punished you because you, a brave and intelligent girl like you, wasted your time arguing with a fool and you have come to me for such a stupid reason and disturbed the peace.”

And she added with more seriousness …. ”I hope you had a good reflection in being silent? Never argue with a fool.

Aouch! How I miss my Aunty Franca.

Sometimes, I still find myself indulging in sheety arguments trying to change the mind of a fool. Chai! Father Lord, I am so sorry. You ain’t done with the lessons, are You? I still have more to learn. I got some feedback from others who are also struggling with silence, and I knew that You want to continue schooling me, with stories only the wise, and the willing could recognize.

My friend told me yesterday that often times “the Lie is Louder Than the Truth”. And in her voice, she said: So, there I was, accused of something I didn’t do. In the corporate world, a whisper can spread faster than a press release. My first instinct? Call a meeting, draft a five-paragraph defence email, cc HR, legal, and maybe God, too, she laughed.

But she said her spirit whispered so distinctly, “Ssshhh. Be silent” And for once, she listened. She said nothing.

And something strange happened. The accuser kept talking… and talking… and unravelling. And she smiled through it in silence. Her silence 1st made others curious. Then skeptical. Then supportive. And as surely as the dawn, the truth unveiled.

Hmmm.

I thought deeply about it because sometimes people take silence for consent or guilt. What if they had believed and propagated the lie? But then I remembered that though the Truth may tarry, it never misses a deadline. Eventually, the truth came out, not because she shouted it, but because silence gave it room to walk in dignity. Thank you for helping her Lord, it could have been worse.

You know Lord, I too have my own experiences, there are times when Life Slaps You on one cheek and asks you to turn the other cheek. So, there was this one morning, everything went wrong. Project lost. Health scare. Generator failed. Even my favorite suya spot was closed. Life hit like Lagos traffic during rainy season. I wanted to vent. To shout into the abyss. I screamed for you, called you, asked to talk……Silence.

I begged, then whined and then threw some tantrums…. But again, the silence came.

But somehow, instead of spiralling out of control, I sat still. I didn’t sit still out of obedience; I just was tired of fretting. So, I just sat…. Just me and my thoughts. In that quiet moment, I felt peace. Just a strange calmness that didn’t make sense. I felt my spirit ask some good questions: “What can I control?” What’s the worst thing that could happen?” “What’s the lesson here?” “Where is the next opportunity?”

And in that solemn moment, I felt no fear, no anxiety, none. The silence didn’t solve the problem, but it quelled the panic. Silence didn’t remove the storm, but it helped me find the umbrella. And Dad, that was when I realised that silence isn’t about pretending all is well, it’s about preparing for what will be well.

I have been in a meeting where the host was hauling out comments that was… less than professional. My ears burned. My pride wanted to react. I even rehearsed some savage comeback in my mind.

My spirit whispered, “Easy, sssshush, the customer is king” …. And I whispered back angrily ….” And I am the king maker”. But then, I remembered who I am. And I remembered the who that You are, Lord.

So, I simply smiled and kept very silent. The room fell quiet. He probably wanted some debates and arguments, but no one took him up on it. Finally, he recollected himself and made some futile attempt at politeness and calmed down. At the end, we resolved the problem, which he caused by the way, and shook good hands on it.

Later, a colleague said, “You handled that with class.” I smiled. If he had read my mind all that time, aaaah. I winked at him and said, “I believe the silence did the trick.”

I have learnt some though. I am getting there. You know those quiet early mornings, with you, Lord? Before emails ping and expectations knock? I started sitting in those moments. Just silence. No phone. No agenda. Just You and me. And oh, the things my spirit has unveiled….?

Old dreams resurfaced. New insights appeared. Flaws became teachers. Goals sharpened. In silence, I found someone I had neglected: Myself. Turns out, the best version of me was always waiting in the quiet. Waiting for me to stop talking, stop moving, and push the Pause-Button.

So here I am, Lord. No longer afraid of silence. In fact, I seek it. Crave it. Recommend it like a miracle drug (side effects include peace, wisdom, and fewer relationship incidents).

So again, I say to everyone hustling through life like me:

When the self-righteous ones start a cold debate, smile and nod in silence.

When falsely accused, hold your peace. Let truth breathe.

In hardship, pause. Wisdom needs silence to be heard.

When insulted, don’t join the circus. Walk past the clowns.

In conflict, listen longer. Respond wiser. (this is usually hard but don’t worry, we will get there)

For growth, retreat often. Your soul wants to speak to you.

Peace, be still!

 

Dad, thank You for the lessons in stillness. For teaching me that silence isn’t empty, it’s pregnant with power. I now understand why You sometimes choose silence. You’re not ignoring us. You’re inviting us to tune in to you.

This is your daughter, Lord, learning, rising, falling, and rising again th

rough life’s journey. I am checking in.